A Letter of Appreciation from the Black Legion (currently burning in Hell)

Folks,

The Reverend Robert Smith, Jr. of the New Bethel Baptist Church, Detroit, Michigan, has written an op-ed piece here titled "Ban All Guns." I was going to write a piece challenging the good reverend's idiocy, but it seems that mysterious destiny has turned the wheel first. Read below.

Mike
III

Here is the Reverend.




Here is the Reverend's original piece in full:

Ban All Guns

The Founding Fathers of our country made a mistake when they said we had the right to bear arms. They did not know we would be allies with the British and no longer have to worry about them coming over to oppress and colonize us. The British found greater spoils in Africa and India and never looked back on the United States after the Revolutionary War.

The right to bear arms is killing all of us. In 2005 the Center for Disease Control and Prevention reported 3,006 children and teens killed by gunfire, most of them young, black men in inner-city neighborhoods. And CNN reported yesterday that black-on-black murder of young black men is up 40 percent from last year. The harder the times get, the higher these statistics will go.

The Virginia Tech and Northern Illinois gun killings took 32 lives, and the world was upset and every day 128 young people are shot to death in hard-pressed, poor communities across America and there is no outcry to change it, just report it on the local news. The reporting is so sensationalized that it makes stars of the infamous murderers in the poor black communities. Young men often tell their friends to watch the 6 o'clock news for their action.

We need to ensure that those we elect to public office are not so stuck on protecting us from another British invasion that they cannot enact legislation that will limit the number of guns in our country. It is time to end this culture of violence. We have become desensitized to the point that we play video games that glorify murder -- even cop murder.


Here is my email to the Reverend and his email from his many white racist fans in Hell.

TO: The Reverend Robert Smith, Jr.
New Bethel Baptist Church
8430 Linwood Street
(C. L. Franklin Blvd.)
Detroit, MI 48206
Via Email to: pastorsmith@nbbcdetroit.org

Cover Letter:
Dear Reverend Smith,

Last night I went to bed pondering your opinion piece, "Ban All Guns," posted on the Detroit News website.

This morning I awoke to find an email sent by one Colonel Harvey Davis, from a blind web address called "BlackLegionRoasting@beelzebub.org". Curious, I opened it to the sound of crackling flames and a pungent brimstone odor to find a rather long personal message addressed to you, and the following notation to me :

Dear Race Traitor Vanderboegh,

Reliable email being hard to come by here at the Lake of Fire Retirement Home (we don't even have WiFi), I tried to send this message to Reverend Smith directly but it bounced back (Satan has our filters set so tightly that no message addressed to a religious institution of any kind can get through). I was frustrated until your great uncle Reynolds who used to be a fellow member in the Indiana Klan in the Twenties (I was there when that Jewish businessman shot him in butt with the Browning Automatic Rifle -- the whole thing scared me out of my sheets, I can assure you), told me that you would probably be willing to forward it out of curiosity if nothing else. He said though you had strayed from the historical family opinions and had been an ardent opponent of the Ku Klux Klan and NeoNazis in your time, that you might send it on to the Reverend regardless of its source because it deals with a subject near and dear to your heart. We know you serve the Other Guy, but perhaps you could make an exception in this case? We only get a five minute break every third week (as you reckon time), the demons are very strict about that. Thanking you in advance, I am,

Sincerely,

Colonel Harvey Davis
Formerly of the Black Legion, Detroit Chapter and King Kleagle of the Indiana-Ohio Knights of the Ku Klux Klan.

Well, Reverend, Colonel Davis had me pegged. I AM intrigued by how you're going to answer this one. Here is his message to you below.

Mike Vanderboegh
PO Box 926
Pinson, AL 35126
GeorgeMason1776@aol.com


A Member of the Black Legion and a member of the Klan Meet and Greet -- "Hi, Mom!"



Reverend Smith,

Me and the boys of the Black Legion would like to thank you for your op-ed piece entitled "Ban All Guns." I have to tell you that it gave us the biggest laugh we've had in, I don't know, maybe ten years (ever since we saw Bill Clinton on the Condemned News Network saying, "I did not have sex with that woman. Ms. Lewinsky"). I must say you improved our morale immensely.

I doubt you remember us, since your historical amnesia seems nearly complete, but we of the Black Legion once rode through the Black Bottom neighborhood of Detroit in our flowing black robes with white skull and crossbones on our hats, terrorizing any of your race we could catch. (It was a pretty good deal for me. Every member had to buy a robe -- they cost seven dollars, which was a lot of money back then -- and I got a percentage.)

We founded the Black Legion in 1933 for the purposes of upholding "Americanism, Womenhood, and Protestantism." All the founding members were Kluxers, but we figured that we needed a new moniker and marketing plan. We'd get some poor credulous sod to take the oath that he'd join in our war against "Negroes, Communists, Jews, Catholics and aliens" and then we'd hold a revolver to his heart and make him swear to "be torn limb from limb and scattered to the carrion" if he betrayed the Legion's secrets. Best thing about it was he had to buy a gun from us and pay ten cents monthly dues. I got a cut of that too. It was great fun.

Why once on a nice spring night in 1935, we shot a Negro by the name of Silas Coleman just because I wanted to see what it felt like to kill a ni- (Oops, almost messed up there, the demon supervisors down here sure don't cotton to us using racial slurs, especially since they're all of African descent and we're all "narrow ass white boys" as my crew boss Elijah Muhammed says.) I MEANT to say, "I wanted to see what it felt like to kill a Negro." I shot first and all the other boys shot after. They said later he was some half-baked war hero of the Great War (that was before they started numbering them). Didn't mean a thing to me. Still doesn't. Once you get down here, your opportunity for forgiveness and atonement is long past.

Anyway, we would still be riding high if we hadn't screwed up and killed a white man for beating his wife. Only come to find out he hadn't been beating his wife, and plus he was a government bureaucrat from the WPA. They sure don't like it when you kill a government man. But I can't complain. We had a good three year run before they sent us all to prison for life. And Coleman wasn't the only black man I killed for sport. He was just the first.

So you're wondering why a big-deal racist cracker like me liked your editorial? That's easy. I like a black man that's disarmed, because he's easy prey. We Kluxers always have. Hell, uh, Reverend, the first gun control laws in this country were written by white men like me to keep black men like you from having guns. Then came Reconstruction, same thing. I want to tell you, the only thing us Kluxers ever feared was guns in the hands of black men who knew how to use them.

And here you are, preaching unilateral black disarmament. Me and all the Kluxers and the Black Legion boys down here just didn't live long enough. I mean, look at you. You're doing a better job of killing yourselves off than we ever dreamed of doing. Every time a young black girl goes to an abortionist, we grin. Every time one of your young men embraces the "gangsta" death culture and kills another of his own race, we giggle. And now you want to unilaterally disarm?

Have you never heard of Dr. Ossian Sweet? How about how in 1942 when the residents of the Sojourner Truth housing project defended their new homes with firearms after a white mob that numbered over a thousand (many of whom were armed) burned a cross in a nearby field and threw a cordon around the neighborhood vowing to keep out any black homeowners? Those incidents happened in your own city of Detroit, Reverend.


An armed black homeowner protects his property and family from roving white mobs near the Sojourner Truth neighborhood in Detroit, 1942.


How about Rosewood, Florida, or the Tulsa Race Riot of 1921? How about the Detroit Race Riots of 1863 and 1943? Does any of this ring a bell? We've been killing unarmed black folks for centuries and you want to disarm? Sweet.


Have you never heard of the Deacons for Defense and Justice? They were after my time, but sometimes I go to the acid baths with Byron de la Beckwith -- you know, the guy who killed Medgar Evers -- and just the very mention of them sets him in a tizzy. Black veterans with semi-automatic rifles. In between burnings and flayings, I never could figure out why all those advocates of Gandhian nonviolence during the Civil Rights movement in the South didn't get croaked right off by men in white regalia. Come to find out, it was because they were being guarded by Deacons. It may have been hypocritical of Martin Luther King, but he apparently never turned down their help. Hell, I wouldn't have either. Disarmament's for people who want to be lynched.

Which is why I want to thank you for your editorial. You just keep talking black folks into disarming. You ban all the guns you want. Give people groceries, color television sets and debit cards in return for their guns. You get them all nice and pacified. When you do, then the Klan can ride again. Because I'll tell you one thing Reverend, the Klan ain't never gonna disarm no matter how many laws you pass. If you think our time can't come round again, you're whistlin' past the graveyard of history. A lot those graves are filled by incautious or well-intentioned black men who thought just like you. And a lot more will be if people listen to you. So keep it up, Reverend. You have the best wishes and unqualified support of every member of the Ku Klux Klan and the Black Legion currently burning in Hell.

Colonel Harvey Davis

Formerly of the Black Legion, Detroit Chapter and King Kleagle of the Indiana-Ohio Knights of the Ku Klux Klan.
Current address, Lake of Fire Retirement Home, Fifth Level of Hell, Zip Code 666