Well, folks, the NRA, unwilling to spend its "political capital" on the fight against Eric Holder, has found something to do with plain old capital -- you know, its members' dues money -- by going into a sideline. It's not uncommon for a business in the middle of a downturn to try to diversify in order to survive and here is the NRA's attempt:
Yes, that's right, wine. Pete at WRSA reports it with derision this way:
Friday, January 30, 2009
Get Your Stinking-Cheap NRA Wine Right Here, Ladies and Gentlemen!
In an email received this evening by NRA members, the Lairds of Fairfax have stooped to hawking table plonk.
Is there anything the Lairds won't do for money?
Next, I'm thinking that a NRA Geek-o-Rama Sideshow would be a real crowd-pleaser. We could have Wayne "He's French, You Know" LaPierre garbed in a blaze-orange skintight latex jumpsuit biting the heads off live poultry, while an overall-and-gingham-clad Chris "Deep Insider" Cox demonstrated various techniques of, shall we say, animal husbandry.
NRA Board Member Joaquin "I'm a Law Enforcement Legend" Jackson could tell us again how "assault weapons need to be (only) in the hands of the military and the police."
Then, to top off the freak show, former NRA President Sandy "Harvard Law" Froman could enter on rollerskates while juggling piglets and tell us all again what a famous victory Heller was.
Man, I know I'd pay big bucks to hear all of these mutts tell us, once again, how that SCOTUS decision means that the "Second Amendment as an individual right now becomes a real permanent part of American Constitutional law.”
We could make and sell DVDs afterwards, and maybe even have pay-per-view live streaming video.
Then, after enough money is raised to pay these overpriced Quislings' salaries and expense accounts, we could get back to business.
Like instead of spamming their membership earlier this evening with emails pushing rotgut wine, how's about calling in the chits for the Senators NRA helped to elect and get one or more holds put against AG-nominee Eric Holder?
That might burn bridges. Senators, law enforcement Gauleiters, and various imperial lobbyists might not invite the Lairds to their cocktail parties after such a radical step.
Can't have that.
Not if Wayne et al are going to keep their membership in the exclusive DC Insiders club, a/k/a The Beltway Bandits.
After all, they've got a wine business to keep afloat.
Drop the NRA.
Join GOA. They sent this email alert re the last stand against Holder this morning.
Let Wayne and his posse twist in the wind.
They've earned it.
Now, I love Pete like a brother, and while I concur with everything he said above (including "table plonk"), I think he's taking this entirely too seriously. OK, their franchise line of work certainly isn't working out. It's embarrassing, really. They've reduced themselves to being Judenrat conductors on the freight train carrying their members to the camps. "All aboard the 'Arbeit Macht Frei' Express! Would you like a bottle of wine to go with your moldy bread and fetid water?"
And yet, why shouldn't the NRA diversify? I mean if they're not going to spend their members' money fighting for Second Amendment rights as advertised, going into the wine business so they can at least recoup a little money is, I suppose, only doing their fiduciary duty.
But as knowledgeable as Chris Cox and Wayne ("He's French!") LaPierre are about Washington dinner parties, I don't think they'll make a success of this wine business. OK, they are cheese-eating surrender monkeys, and wine goes with cheese, but I just don't think they've quite got it right yet as a business plan.
No, I think they should go into a venture they REALLY understand. Forget the wine, guys, how about THIS marketing idea?
Now THIS is an area of expertise for the Lairds of Fairfax. THIS is something they really know about. They've been diddling their members for years with false representations of how tough they are as a lobbying group. Now they can put that knowledge to work for a change. Waddayathink? Am I right, or what?