"Hellooooo! Is anybody home?" I hand deliver Issa's letter to Melson to Fort Apache. Very funny exercise in big men with badges & guns hiding.

"Don't go out there! It's Vanderboegh and he's got us surrounded!"

So, I'm typing this late in the afternoon from the Trussville Public Library because I haven't yet been home, my morning and afternoon having been taken up with visits to the lawyer, the doctor, the library downtown to visit a live drop, and finally to the ATF headquarters in Birmingham with a copy of Darrell Issa's letter and my first Timeline, showing my fingerprints all over the early stages of this Gunwalker scandal.

You might want to Google Earth the address, 920 18th Street North. It is a compound surrounded by the latest in bomb-standoff design, blast resistant steel fencing, and other manifestations of extreme paranoia in building design.

You can't walk in the door, of course. You have to walk up to a huge gate in the steel fence -- very far from the front door -- with cameras, electronic locks and all, push the button, state your business, and then the Doorman to Oz let's you in if you're found worthy.

Well, I wasn't worthy. I walked up to the gate and pushed the button. Through the sound system I could hear the bell. It was working, at least. Nothing. I waited a little bit and said, "Hellooooo! Is anybody home?"

Nothing.

I waited some more. The sun was just right and I could see government employees looking out the windows.

I pushed the button again.

Nothing.

"Hellooooo!"

Nothing.

Well, okaaaaay, then. What to do?

I have to confess, it wasn't what I expected. I didn't figure they were so scared of me that they wouldn't even talk to me through a steel squawk box.

So, I just took the Issa letter and the Timeline and wedged it in the gate. Then, waving, laughing and giving the big bad boys with guns and badges at the windows two thumbs up, I got in my car and left.

What wussies.

Of course there is the fact that pursuant to orders from ATF headquarters they have opened a file on me and are going about northern Alabama leaning on everyone I have ever met even casually for information on my "law breaking." Of course, too, there is no "law breaking" nor probable cause of law-breaking so the entire investigation of me and my friends, etc., is a political witchhunt for someone they consider an "enemy of the state."

Now, given that:

a. The bosses who ordered them to do this have an extreme liklihood of not being their bosses for very much longer, and

b. That they can then be held accountable for any actions contrary to law that they have taken against me in furtherance of a cover-up, and

c. That if they keep on doing what they are doing after Grassley and Issa have already put their agency on notice, well, then,

d. Unless they too wish to subpoenaed to give testimony under oath, well then,

e. They've got every right in the word to be frightened like little five year olds, even of an old fat man with congestive heart failure and a cane.

I guess, in retrospect, there was only one thing I forgot to say to the silent steel box:

"Boo!"

Maybe I'll put that in the letter my lawyer sends to them.

Mike Vanderboegh
ATF Scandalmonger, First Class and the alleged leader of a merry band of Three Percenters. ;-)

LATER: A friend called after I posted this and when I told him the story, after he finished laughing himself half to death, he said "yeah, they were hiding behind the curtains, calling out to one another: 'Don't go out there! It's Vanderboegh and he's got us SURROUNDED!'"

BOO!!!