Thursday, February 25, 2010

A Deviously Simple Question: The War for Chekov's Ear

"Sure, understanding today's complex world of the future is a little like having bees live in your head. But, there they are." -- The Honorable Chester Cadaver, "I Think We're All Bozos on This Bus," Firesign Theatre, 1970.

I had the unrestrained joy this morning of having a letter to the ATF read to me over the phone regarding a major faux pas in recent regulations. It is a mistake on their part that is at once so small and so huge that the mere receipt of this letter will cause them to think like Chester Cadaver (pronounced Ka-duh-VER) that they have bees living in their heads, or worse, that Khan's mind control slug has crawled into their ears.

I can only marvel at the brilliance of operational art of the man who wrote this letter, which is, at this very moment being faxed to the agency.

I mention this now only so my readers will have a reference point when this deviously simple question begins to make headlines. It is so you can say, "Yeah, I remember that."

Those of you familiar with Bozos by Firesign will know how the President reacted to Clem's subversive question: "Why does the porridge bird lay his eggs in the air?"

For those of you unfamiliar with the classics, the answer was exemplified by Pico (or was it Alvardo?) and his plaintive cry: "Hey, man, I tink he broke da Prezident!"


Gaviota said...

Aw, man, how come you didn't post the letter? Yer teasin' us.

drjim said...

Maybe if we push this agency hard enough, it *will* fall over!

Anonymous said...

Now you've broken ME.
I have a lot of the old Firesign Theatre - on vinyl.
I have a turntable.
But no (working) tonearm or cartridge.

DAMN! I want to listen to that again. Bad.

"Oh how can you be in two places at once, when you're not anywhere at allllll."

"Warning. Merging busses ahead."

B Woodman

Carl said...

What fun to be reminded of old Firesign. The kids give me pretty strange looks when I quote a line or two, or sing a verse, but that's OK, I'm old enough to have some dementia, and young enough to enjoy it. I'd love to see that letter, meanwhile the highway signs says: "Antelope Freeway 1/8 Mile."

jon said...

you can still buy firesign CDs online. in fact, they're still at it. check out their website.

Anonymous said...

"Well, it ain't no use if you ain't got the boost, the boost you get from Loostner's. Loostner's, the all weather breakfast."


wv: doweil, what I'd like to shove up BATFE's ass.

Gaviota said...

B. Woodman:

I have "We're All Bozos On This Bus," "Nick Danger - The Case of the Missing General," and "A Child's Garden of Grass" in MP3 format on my computer. Want some? Shoot me an email at and I'll forward you a copy.

Anonymous said...

Not fair! Not fair! He doesn't love the chillun! Jeez, post this and no letter?? OMG-we wait with bated breath.

HK Shooter said...

Anonymous, check with a stereo repair shop; because of the hip hop craze, you may be able to get replacement parts.

rexxhead said...

Odd coincidence...

Anonymous said...

Seriously - when do WE get to see?

Anonymous said...

"B Woodman III-per... I have a turntable. But no (working) tonearm or cartridge."

That's what the thrift stores are all about, or try e-bay, or just do a web search for places that sell this old stuff. Or, better yet maybe you should just forget it, as in our youth we do things that should not be repeated in our mature years as in:

"Carl... I'm old enough to have some dementia.."

I think you guys are all demented, or I had a very sheltered upbringing as I never heard of Firesign Theatre, on vinyl or not. This isn't some sort of Southern Swamp Rocky Horror Show thing is it? Talk about demented... I mean are we looking at HogJaw as Elvira..! OMG that was too much.. Come on guys, I just hang out here waiting and waiting for that sorry scribbler to finally post another chapter, but this sort of stuff is really getting more than my poor psyche can handle.. I have to go upchuck now - Elvira!


cmblake6 said...

I'd really like to see that letter as well! We have until November, folks. We need to get those in power who will stand for what We The People want, not for the sake of what their college brainwashers attempted to instill. Check your primaries for the best of those, get off your ass and make it to the general. If we don't vote with paper, we must vote with lead.